Monday, February 15, 2010

FWT: A Dangerous Man, Supes/Doomsday, Accidental Spy, Born to Defense,

Lately I've found that I just don't have the drive to write lengthy film reviews for everything that I watch (As was the original plan). Instead, I'll be listing the films I've seen in a day and write something short or long depending on my mood.

A Dangerous Man (North America. 2009)

"Come back, I'm going to kill you bitch" - Some Guy Dubbing Over Steven Seagal.

Seagal wears his bad ass doo-rag. Seagal looks constipatedly confused as a naked woman frolics on top of him. Seagal beats a bunch of punks to a BLOODY pulp with only THE SLIDE PART OF THE GUN! Seagal gives a heart warming speech off a bunch of cue cards as the editor desperately tries to cut around his sleepy eyed performance.

It's an average, super-quotable Seagal flick where his story seems to be the B-Plot to everything else going on (which is becoming a trend). There's some slightly over the top moments over violence (every baddie gets caked in blood) but nothing extravagant enough to make this a must see.

"I'm going to fuck you up ugly."

- Superman/Doomsday (North America/Animated. 2007)

DC Animated Films continue to deliver the greatest superhero action on the market. Marvel Animated pales in comparison to the storytelling, character design and sure unadulterated excitement factor contained in a DC production. The Death of Superman story is stripped to its bare essentials, but its still one hell of a knock em drag out ride with a surprisingly grim tone (Superman vomits blood at one poin). I think the adulation should be laid at the feet of Co-Director Lauren Dowell - her work on Wonder Woman and JLA: Two Earths shows that she brings the quality to the table.

- The Accidental Spy (Hong Kong. 2001)

Average Hong Kong Jackie Chan effort. Muddled plot (He's never even a freaking spy!), not enough action and it all ends in vehicular destructive ending instead of an actual martial arts brawl - a trend that Chan fell to a lot in the later part of his career.

- Born to Defense (Hong Kong. 1986)

Jet Li's only directorial effort is a well-shot big budgeted period drama with Jet facing off against those dastardly Americans! It's atypical of most of his work for having most of the fighting take place in the boxing ring and emphasizing gritty energy as opposed to coolly choreographed artistry. There's a lot of nifty ideas half-way executed. The action is abundant and well put together, but it feels ropey due to Jet's sparring partners (All of the Caucasian) and so-so camera angles. The script is classic Hong Kong quality, made up as they went along, with a weird final act taking a turn into Brutal-Revenge-Cinema territory. Jet Li ends up being a broken and bruised piece of flesh by the time the end credits roll.

- Inspector Wears Skirts (Hong Kong. 1988)

Below average Girls with Guns flick patterned after the POLICE ACADEMY flicks while that somehow succeeds at being extra unfunny and annoying. The action that bookends the film is decently choreographed by the Jackie Chan Team, but it isn't worth checking it out for that alone.

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