Wednesday, January 5, 2011


- Castaway on the Moon (200) - KOREA

- EXAM (2009. UK) The cover led me to believe this was going to be a bloody torture porn style horror flick, but I was pleasently to discover a more suspense heavy affair with no gore to speak of. The actors do great work and the only major misstep is a never ending final explanation. Highly recommended.

- Kiss Me Deadly (1955): Iron fisted noir from Robert Aldrich that has nothing but mean bones in its body. Very loosely based on Mickey Spillane's novel Mike Hammer in the film is more of a dunder headed cypher then the series' hard hitting detective.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011


Perfectly designed from a visual and aural perspective (thanks to the Daft Punk Score) TRON: LEGACY sadly has no real engrossing conflict to carry the viewer through its narrative. It starts strongly for its first half hour - with the son Jeff Brides character from the original being introduced and quickly getting sucked into the digital world. Sadly, once you get past the 'Fish Out of Water' business that generates its own internal momentum, the film comes to a screeching halt. Everything literally stop for 20 minutes as exposition and background elements are dolled out before slowly jumping back into defeating a threat that's disappointedly vague in its intent. It doesn't help that the film's two show stopping best set pieces are sandwiched together within the first half hour. The Club Battle that happens latter is too short and the Arial battle that ends the film is impressive, but feels like its missing a final punch. Lead actor Garrett Hedlund is charming at first, but is quickly relegated to a reactionary character that doesn't have much to do but throw in a quip here and there. Olivia Wilde is cute and attractive. Jeff Bridges hippies it up and is filled with rage doubling it up as a creepy young CGI version of himself. Recommended.

Monday, January 3, 2011


Buster Keaton's films have such good comedy set pieces that it hurts - the film as a whole and my side from laughing so hard. Keaton puts together some of the best comedy you have ever seen, but at the same time it's quite a slog of nothing to get to that point sometimes. Still, this film has a great performance, a cracker jack plot (Keaton has to stay in the house of people that want to kill him, because they won't kill him unless he's outside) and that comedy I keep talking about. Must see.

The Natural (1984) - FILM

Just look at that poster. Take it in. Could it be more cheesy? Well, I guess you could have some puppies running along with him, or some kids, maybe an angel lifting him up to catch that pop fly.

To accept a film like THE NATURAL you have to consciously let your intellectual guard down. The place of realism has no pace in the underdog story of Robert Redford as a baseball player that enters the majors late in his life and starts a winning streak. This film is a painterly portrait of a fictional Americana where the Good Guys (TM) are GOOD and the Bad Guys (TM) are BAD. The director has no qualms about the fact that he's painting a straight faced mythology for the audience. The picture doesn't cleverly states that Robert Redford is Christ like figure - it goes out of its way to show you in a number of different way: Redford affects weather, he hits impossible balls and he never quits. If you don't believe, you won't make it. If you're a cinema goer you're aware of the tropes that come with the Sports Story you're also aware that they can be done well and done badly. In THE NATURAL they're done wonderfully. Director Barry Levinson knows the film he's making and he sticks to those roots. No matter how syrupy the on screen action gets, the audience can go along without being torn out of it, and that's the most important part of all.



A classic comedy with a series of jaw dropping gags that will astound you no matter who, what, where you are. t takes a little while to get going (about 15 minutes before the funny really starts to set in) but its undeniably awe inspiring. No one did Physical stunt like Keaton. No one. He even broke his neck during one of the takes in the film.

Sunday, January 2, 2011


Yes this film has a disturbing plot line that happens half way through: Seven woodsmen kidnap seven women to make them their brides and they all get stuck in the cabin. What's even more disturbing is that the women seemingly go stir crazy and start lusting to be married and pregnant. They don't even get to know their soon to be husbands, they just abstractly want to get knocked up by the first thing that steps into their path. Up until the odd immoral shift in tone, the film is a breezy back lot musical in all its fake glory.

From a musical production standpoint, it's not exactly my cup of tea because most of the numbers are of the stand around and sing variety. It gets dull fast, no matter how nice people's voice are. The biggest disappointment is that halfway through the film there's a crazed ten minute display of gymnastic fortitude from all the brothers...the most famous moment of the film...and nothing before or after even touches on it.

The Fighter (2010) - FILM

Fantastic moving film with average boxing scenes but an absolute killer performance by Christian Bale. David O. Russel is a filmmaker I wish was less of a dick...only because he'd probably get more movies done that way.

Saturday, January 1, 2011


New Years is here and that means resolutions. Prick up your ears for the empty promises one makes in hopes that the next flashing moments of life are better then the last. Everything can be better a little voices say, all you have to is try, or you could end up dead, painfully so.

The promises are clear and in IMAX THREE DIMENSION NEON: Keep things cleaner, eat healthier, do more exercise, concentrate better at school, write more, be more creative, reach your dreams and conquer your enemies.

All the normal stuff.

Being creative is the most important thing to me (even if my parents would argue that the first four are of dire importance). Somehow against my best cowardly tendencies, I'm weeks away from finishing shooting a film I wrote and directed, which is jaw dropping in itself. The one thing that I haven't done is write a book, which i s something that I promised myself to do when I was of the tender age of 12. I have to get that. Someday. Like now.

I need to watch more movies.

Yes, I realize how ridiculous that sounds if you know me in the slightest.

Being creative for me has always been an extension of the arts and entertainment that I consume - it's impossible for me to work in a vacuum of my own thoughts. If I see a Western, I want to birth six shooter cowboy oater. If I see Sci-Fi, I want to envision fantastical space opera dramas. If I see pornography I want to...

Yet, with all the opportunities around me, I'm crippled with choice. I don't know what to watch so I watch nothing. I can't count the number of times I've just decided to take a nap instead of make a difficult decision of watching EVIL DEAD II or ARMY OF DARKNESS. I lead a sad empty existence.

Jumping from the great 1001 MOVIES YOU NEED TO WATCH BEFORE YOU DIE I will watch one film from the book a day. That way I always have somewhere to jump from, I will have no more excuses of lack of quality, and I will expand my horizons.

Instead of writing movie reviews for each film, especially keeping in consideration that all the films included in the book have pretty good write ups in the first place, my 'critical breakdowns' will take place in a more diary form. I have a fairly dull life (other than the constant fear of ending up shaking a tin can on the street) so thoughts on a review coupled with lines like 'I barely got up this morning because there was nothing for me to get up to so I watched MATRIX RELOADED which was way too long and cause me to go back to bed' will undoubtedly make riveting daily fiction.

I'm making efforts to improve (as obvious as that is) my faults, but I sadly can't make any promises. One thing I can guarantee is that 2011 will be different. Not necessarily better, but different, and sometimes that's the most important thing of all.